Goodbye sweet Sindie

I can find no other words than to tell you that my sweet daughter Sindie passed away on 15th October 2009.

She was not just my daughter, but my best friend.

I love and miss you so much.

Sleep tight Sindie

XXXXXX

Be Aware!!!

My husband decided to give the growing grass a 'first cut' after the long winter months months of it lying dormant.

He happily mowed away until the large grass box was full, and then set about emptying it. As he pulled out the grass box, there, sitting stunned underneath it, were four large mice! The poor things must have been terrified with that loud motor sound in their ears, and being sandwiches between the mower and the removable grass box. After a few minutes, three of the mice managed to get themselves together, and run out of the grass box, but the third, smallest one just sat there, still stunned.

My husband carefully lifted him out and put him in the bushes, and was pleased to see it shake itself and run away, non the worse for wear apparently.

Perhaps you had better check your machinery for mice or other small animals before you do your first cut of the year. We live in the country, so there are always little mice running around in the gardens. We would never dream that they would make their home inside a lawn mower. There is absolutely nothing that they can eat in the shed where it is housed. I was so pleased to see them all run free again. It could so easily have been a messy outcome. Please remember to check.

Absence

I would like to apologise for my absence to whoever normally reads my blog, but I have had a lot going on lately. Namely hospital visits and radiotherapy for my daughter Sindie. Each time I think I will have a go at a blog, my mind just goes blank! All we are thinking about at the moment are hospitals, scans and tests.
We have a couple more scans on the horizon, and with some pain management, hopefully things will settle down a bit for Sindie. Meanwhile she is her usual upbeat self.

A Little Bit Of Art

I was leafing through a Van Gogh book when I came across a painting that I had copied when I was much younger, back in the early seventies. I decided to compare the two after all this time, and must say I was a bit disappointed to see that my copy wasn't as good as I remembered! What do you think?



Portrait of an Actor - Van Gogh My Copy

I was closer when I took the picture of my copy, so it looks larger, but it is actually the same size! It is also behind glass so the colour looks less intense.

I also drew this picture from a photograph of a statue called 'Ecstacy of Saint Theresa', but amongst the hundreds of books I have, I can't find the picture I copied it from. There are plenty on Google, but taken from a different angle.




Again, it is behind glass and done in pencil in 1976, and was very difficult to photograph without a flash. (At least for me it is!!) They can all be seen more clearly by clicking on them.

And there you have it. Two bits of art done many years ago!

Rummaging

I have three large boxes in my huge attic which houses a lot of memories. One has everything to do with my son in it, one for my daughter, and one for me! I was rummaging around in them today having the occasional tear at all the lovely mementos I have collected over the years. I came across a couple of poems. One I had written when my first grandchild was born, and another that I had framed and on the wall of the retirement home that we owned. I thought I would share them with you:0)

My new grandaughters name was Emily who is now 17 years old, and this was written to her parents:

When you wake up this morning,
A new feeling will be there,
Of unbelievable happiness
The two of you will share.

That tiny little bundle,
So warm and soft and new,
Is not anothers baby now
This one belongs to you!

She's totally dependant,
On your gentleness and love,
This little miracle of life
From someone up above.

You'll proudly watch her gathering strength,
Her crawling - that first tooth,
Her faltering words and footsteps,
Her schooling and her youth.

And as she slowly blossoms,
And starts venturing from home,
You'll realise that your daughter
Has a lifestyle of her own.

Her need for you will lessen,
As she finds friends of her own,
And finally settles down with one,
Who will always share her home.

You'll feel a little strange at first,
Somewhat like a 'spare',
But suddenly life is full of joy,
Your grandchild will be there!

Again you'll share the feeling,
Of this first day again,
As you hold the tiny baby,
Emotions are the same.

But this time the lovely feeling,
Will be yours to share around,
With three other happy grandfolk,
In who this joy abounds.

The time will pass so quickly,
You must savour every day,
Of this lovely tiny new born babe,
To whom you both gave life today.

* * *

Now at the other end of life, a poem that speaks volumes. This was found in the locker of an old lady in a geriatric hospital by the nurses clearing it out after she had died:

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT

What do you see nurses, what do you see?
What are you thinking, when you look at me?
A crabby old woman, not very wise,
uncertain of habit, with faraway eyes;
who dribbles her food and makes no reply
when you say in a loud voice 'I do wish you'd try'.
Who seems not to notice the things that you do
and forever is losing a stocking or shoe;
Who unresisting or not, lets you do as you will
with bathing and feeding, the long day to fill.

Is that what you're thinking, is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, you're not looking at me!
I'll tell you who I am as I sit here so still,
As I move at your bidding, as I eat at your will.

I'm a small child of ten with a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters who love one another,
A young girl of sixteen with wings on her feet,
Dreaming of soon now a lover she'll meet.

At twenty five now I have young of my own,
who need me to build a secure happy home.
A woman of thirty, my young now grow fast
bound to each other with ties that should last.

At forty my young now will soon be gone,
but my man stands beside me to see I don't mourn.
At fifty once more babies play round my knee,
Again we know children, my loved one and me.

Dark days are upon me, my husband is dead,
I look to the future, I shudder with dread;
For my young are all busy, rearing young of their own,
And I think of the years and the love I have known.

I'm an old woman now, and nature is cruel,
'tis her jest to make old age look a fool.
The body it crumbles, grace and vigour depart,
and now there's a stone where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcase, a young girl still dwells,
and now and again, my battered heart swells.
I remember the joys, I remember the pain,
And I'm loving and living life over again.

I think of the years all too few gone too fast,
And accept the cold facts that nothing can last,
So open your eyes nurses, open and see,
not a crabby old woman, look closer - SEE ME!

All done!!

At the risk of boring you all senseless, here is a final video clip of the fence all finished! You have no idea what a mammoth job that was for one old aged pensioner to do on his own. Thank goodness it is all over. The whole job was made worse due to the fact that the garden is on quite a slope! Now he said he intends to take a week off to potter, then start on the transformation of the dressing room into another guest bedroom. He has until Christmas to get that finished, so can take his time if he wants to, but knowing Lennie, he will go at it until it is finished!

Moving on!

Thank goodness for a break in this nasty weather! It has been pouring down, and making everything very muddy, and uncomfortable to work in. Lennie has managed to work outside all day today, and things are moving on.

Thankfully, our next door neighbours have gone to France for a week, so we do not have to worry about intruding on their privacy. Pickles is being very good, and has not attempted to go into their garden once, so that is one less worry.

I must admit I am going a bit 'stir crazy' because we usually manage to get out once a day, even if it is to visit my daughter Sindie. She and her family have gone to Kent for a few days to attend the funeral of her father-in-law. I don't like driving, especially by myself, and we live in such a hilly place that I am sure I would have a heart attack if I decided to go walking round here! And of course, Lennie has no time to go off jaunting about!

He is working so hard, as I have probably said before, but hopefully things will ease up a bit now, as he is on the shorter concrete posts, which only weigh 84lbs, whereas the others weighed 126lb! Still very heavy as they are such a dead weight, but a little easier on the arms and back. He is also moving on to earth as opposed to concrete, so the digging will be easier as well.

I have attached a video to show you how he is getting on.

More news as it happens:0)